Ellen Stafford (chicaboo25) wrote,
Ellen Stafford

I can't sleep tonight. Things playing on my mind plus I have a sore throat. Nigel is over this evening and I am annoying him by swolling all the time which I can't help because my glands are up....so I have come back downstairs. He has to be up at 7am as he has to work tomorrow so I guess I will sleep in tomorrow.

I want to get my life back on track and stop worrying about something that is beyond my control now. I have appologised quite a lot for the mistakes I made the other night, I feel there is little more I can do. If my friend doesn't want to talk to me anymore then I am just going to have to get on with life and forget and get over it. A lot of friends have already told me it isn't worth carrying on after all it was a silly misunderstanding and very immature to be ignoring me still. They have also said that if he really cared about me he would have replied to my messages by now. I guess this is kinda true but for some reason I still hope that he will reply to my messages. Though I think tomorrow is the day when I will start thinking about giving up and getting on with life.

If he is not the one for me then he isn't. There are plenty more people out there who will see me for who I am and even though I hate my appearance I do believe that I have a good heart and that I have a lot of love to give the right person. It's just taking time to find that person. I hope one day my friend will be happy with what he chooses. Whether that is to talk to me and meet me again or to forget about me and go his seperate way. I do care and love him deeply and want what is best for him.

So I have tried my best to contact him and appoligise so now I will leave the ball in his court. If he decides to talk to me then he needs to message me. I am not going to continue hounding him and bombarding him with messages because I have said all that needs to be said for now.

To him: If you read this then please message me sometime if you want to rekindle our friendship.

And all I am going to say now is END OF! No more moany Ellen. Lets get back on track!

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